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Virtual Pink: Explorer Restless Spiritually Longing
you have passion and sensitivity coupled with a strong spiritual side. Time spent by the ocean can help quiet your mind so that you can hear your inner calling. You have a natural healing ability and can recover from ailments more quickly than most. There is a tendency to try many things in relation to career goals. Your personal color helps blend your courage with intelligence, and remind yourself that each journey is an essential part of the outcome and that each endeavour has its own rewards.
from here. i don't normally believe in these... too hokey for my liking... but when it's curiously true, it oddly, makes me feel a little better. like it's assuring me that no matter what path i choose to take... it'll be ok, y'know? -wry smile-
sigh. law interview was... baaaaad. what was i saying?!?! argh. charlatan, thy name is.
in the meantime, was alerted by debbie that the dj hunt finalists are out... checked out the contestants that made it for dj hunt. teh su ching from rj made it!
(-waves to shuling-)
she took the flowers and left at 12:42 PM
ahem. today i went down to plaza singapura to support my radio academy classmates in the dj hunt and... i was pushed into joining by them, but most of all by colin g. who is still possible the nicest 30 something year-old i'll ever meet. and...
i passed the audition! recorded my voice and jean danker said i did a good job (though she probably said that to everyone.) still...
i just... wish, you know. but something tells me i'll be rejected before i reach the final round...
but at least i tried.
-wry smile- it's almost a worthy trade-off for missing alfian sa'at at glossolalia (sp?).
she took the flowers and left at 3:12 PM
so the jury is back, i got accepted by King's, York, queen mary london, and edinburgh. ucl rejected my sorry ass. have safely ruled out edinburgh... but have no idea which one to pick... can you guys (read: anyone who passes by) help me out by telling me your opinion?
in other news, i'd like to say that the oc is an addictive though trashy show.
didn't get 88 as instructor today, but got 85, who is pretty young but with a more yang wen-ish humor. but he's very nice too, though wasn't as relaxed as i am with 88. interestingly, they have similar backgrounds: signed on with the armed forces et al. only difference is that while 88 actively disses the company, 85 adopts a see-no-evil kinda let's not get tangled up in politics attitude. both are fascinating though. sigh. but i doubt i'll get them very often.
life continues to meander out of deep depressions and mindless highs.
she took the flowers and left at 2:15 PM
have been an utterly self-pitying bitch the last few days... but have blogged and whined and slept it over and am feeling a lot better now. moe has confirmed that it is indeed a moe teaching scholarship they will offer me (if i pass the interview) and it is tenable only in singapore. i'll just go try, i guess, and see where that leads me. if there is no major difference between being a scholar and well, not being one, i'll just give it up altogether. maybe having no bond might be better- who knows?
and now, for something happy cos there's too much gloom around here... loved my driving lesson yesterday. finally got 'gary' the driving instructor (hereafter shall be called driving instructor 88) again (cos teachers are rotated all the time) and had a ball. he's wonderfully anti-establishment as well, and sarcastic to boot. and he doesn't dish out the politically correct i-love-company schtick which you usually get, and it helps that he's pretty young (among the instructors there at least) and gary-esque, so i could talk a lot more freely and openly curse as well. heh. i really really hope i get him for my next lesson...
-crosses fingers-
she took the flowers and left at 12:40 PM
feel like i've been on an emotional rollercoaster these few days. post holiday up-up-up, ntu mass com nonsense down-down-down, starsky & hutch with kelvin up-up-up, psc says no no nothing no interview no nothing no no NO down-down-down, moe says yes up-up-up, moe says only for local down-down-DOWN.
i really don't know what to say or what to expect, and it's so easy to hide behind this daria sarcastic persona and pretend i don't need to compete like the rest of the rats, but in the end i am a rat and i am in this race and i am losing steam, lagging, and sooner or later i will be left behind.
is it that easy to just be?
she took the flowers and left at 3:13 PM
heh. yes, alanna, i was in japan :) shall be posting some pictures soon... heh.
(sometimes i wonder what i'm running away from. maybe the fear that one day i'll have to face the fact that i don't have it neverhadit in me after all. and you should follow your dream too... at least you're good at it and actually stand a chance.)
(but you'll never read this anyway, would you? -wry smile-)
she took the flowers and left at 4:06 PM
i'm back!!! and i wish i were still in japan... :(
she took the flowers and left at 10:07 AM
this was supposed to be a bright and cheery post about leaving to japan on a holiday tonight... but now i feel terrible. got a sore throat (and i HATE sore throats) and am feeling tired and terrible. was planning not to go give dawn tuition... but she made me feel so guilty i said i would... urgh... -cough- -hack-
-groan- in the meantime... this blog shall be unupdated till 16th april.... that's my birthday! when i officially turn 19. :(
she took the flowers and left at 7:26 AM
hey... in case any of you have been wondering what the hell happened to me, i've been completely occupied this week. spent a lotta time with kelvin in the day (the boy's shipped off to tekong today) and going to radio academy at night...
yep. i signed up for radio academy... was rather regretting it at first... because i was being dumped in a situation where i didn't know a single person... but it all ended really really great... got to know a lotta really nice people. like this ex-national football player called sasi (who is freakishly tall btw.) and the instructors are just so friendly and nice and you feel like they're really completely genuine with you. mark richmond and colin gomez are really really nice people (i have never met anyone like them...) and i thought mark would've been really intimidating to meet but he was real nice. colin (the programme manager for perfect 10) was really nice too...
and by the end of this course, my confidence has really shot up. i started the course feeling so nauseous before it i couldn't eat my dinner, but by the end of wednesday, someone said my improv was actually... -gasp- good! and on thursday where we recorded our demo i was so damn nervous i stuttered and tripped a bit but when it was all over colin was like, "have you ever done this before in school?" and i was like, "no..." and he said it was really good that i picked myself up and rambled on even after i tripped and that i had a good voice and i sounded really natural! whee~!!! i felt like i was flying after that. felt i could do anything. and today despite the rocky start to the day (i was 20 minutes late...) i got dragged up on stage to do an impromtu kinda thing and i just did some random jokes from shakespeare abridged... and was my usual rambly self, and was awkward and shy (sometimes deliberately so for better effect...) but somehow they thought i was funny. which is incredible, because public performances for me (like in secondary school and even within council) have never been a great hit for me... no one seemed to really understand, but people laughed and by the end of it colin was like, "that is one good stand-up comedian" and it was just so exhilarating yet so bizarre... and people were cheering me on (special thanks to chris who's response really spurred me on. :P) and when i sat down, this classmate who owned an entertainment company asked if i ever did stand-up comedy before, and if i wanted to do it at functions and stuff and sign on with his company, and i got a namecard!!! am absolutely wowed. felt so great, and i really felt like finally i have the courage to audition for anything now... ^__^
got a hug from colin ^__^ and an autograph, which he wrote, "believe, and it will come true" and sasi (being one of the sweetest guys ever and was ever-encouraging and motivational) was like drop me an email to let me know how you're getting on in life... and it's just such a nice feeling to know people care and that you'll have someone looking out for you, especially when my usual buddies are in NS now... like pooh and kelvin... and... sigh. left in really happy tears waving goodbye to everyone... was just so happy yet so sad it was over.
now i feel almost ready to join the dj hunt at plaza singapura on april 24th... heh. even if i'm not a contestant i'll still go to watch my classmates compete for it (i think a lot of them are interested in joining)
as a sidenote i need to say that while i have always hated my voice, i completely did not recognise it on the demo tape... and to my dismay, it's a lot less jean danker and a lot more........ jamie yeo. -bengz- gosh. i can't believe they think that's a good voice. -stabs vocal cords-
she took the flowers and left at 6:59 PM
dO nOT hUNT tHE bUNNIES
because i bizarrely really liked the picture of rukia that i drew, i made a [depressive] blog layout out of it. go me. and
look-- so many
shades of grey! and the font used on the separator is goodbye cruel world. isn't this just a basketful of sunshine.
depressive header title is the title of the instrumental theme that plays in the episode where rukia
leaves karakura for soul society.
kuchiki rukia is from the manga/anime series Bleach and belongs to Kubo Taito, yo. art belongs to meMeME.
cURRENTLY iNGESTING: Ulysses, James Joyce
sQUARE pEG
ai is a struggling and penniless university student alternating her time between humid ol singapore, and freezing |
sweltering* york, england. she has finally hit the big two-oh, and everyday she weeps and beats her breast, and sighs, and
heaves, and cries herself to sleep for the wild and feckless youth she never had. she now spends her time wondering about
authors and readers and texts, and how they all annihilate each other. she's had a pleasant life, the one we've all had,
filled to the brim with the love of absent things. (she also loves alfian sa'at's poetry, in case you hadn't noticed.) if you
think you can make her toes laugh, or if this blog has been your secret guilty pleasure, do feel free to find her at hotmail or yahoo
(*delete in
accordance to season)
rOUND hOLES
a-squared (group blog)
alanna
alfian sa'at (O_O)
alvin
angie
april
bean
christie and cuifen
count olaf
darth vader (roxors!)
esther
en qi
foxed
grace
history girl
jiamin
jing jing
The One Who Thinks I Hate Her
kelvin
ling
louis
min
natalie
pak
pei lin
pepper
pooh
raining
shaRon
victoria
wee zi
xingyi
eVERYTHING sPARKLY
10k commotion
the adventures of pudding
arcana
average jane
babochka
demonology 101
desert rocks
directions of destiny
golden
i harth darth
lapis aquae
luke chueh
Melody
the new adventures of bobbin
No Rest for the Wicked
OrientR
the perry bible fellowship
the powerpuff girls doujinshi
reman mythology
saturnalia
schism
sea of insanity
sinfest
Soul-d
The Students' Sketchpad
square brain
potter puffs!
zero sleep beauty
zombies calling
big top
zits
heart of the city
tHE gREEN fAIRY
potter puppet pals
online comics directory
j k rowling
lemony snicket
aBSENT pRESENCES
past deeds of unspeakable pain and terror
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